This article summarizes Graham Weaver's Stanford Business School commencement speech, focusing on practical advice for overcoming obstacles and living a fulfilling life. The speech addresses key questions like identifying the root of being stuck, finding direction, and stopping procrastination.
About Graham Weaver
Graham Weaver is a seasoned professor at Stanford Business School with over 20 years of experience in private equity. Unlike purely academic professors, Weaver brings practical industry knowledge to his teaching, specializing in strategic management. He is also known for his video, "How to Live an Asymmetric Life."
The Silverado Trail Revelation
Weaver begins with a personal anecdote: feeling trapped in a corporate job, he once escaped a training conference, changed into running clothes, and experienced a moment of clarity while running. He realized, "This isn't you. You don't need to do this." This inner voice urged him to pursue a different path. This resonates with many people who feel disconnected from their work. Many people find themselves in a situation where they're looking for a place to hide and find some personal space.
Commitment 1: Pulling the Nail from Your Head
Identifying the Obstacles
Weaver introduces the concept of a metaphorical "nail in the head"—an unresolved issue that prevents individuals from reaching their full potential. He uses an analogy of a woman complaining about a headache but refusing to acknowledge the nail sticking out of her head. Similarly, we often avoid addressing the core problems holding us back.
Four Types of "Nails"
These "nails" can be categorized into four types:
- Past Bad Habits: Recurring behaviors that hinder progress.
- Past Experiences: Traumatic or negative experiences that haven't been properly processed. These experiences continue to affect future potential.
- Rules and Assumptions: Limiting beliefs and assumptions that restrict possibilities (e.g., "I can't succeed because I didn't grow up in this country."). These limiting beliefs often arise from a desire to feel better about setbacks.
- Fear: The fear of failure, rejection, or change, which prevents action. Fear of being judged or failing often keeps individuals in unsuitable situations.
Addressing the "Nail"
Just like how a management consultant helps clients see the obvious, Weaver suggests identifying and confronting these underlying issues is crucial for unlocking potential.
Commitment 2: Follow Your Energy, Not Just Passion
The Problem with "Follow Your Passion"
Weaver challenges the common advice of "follow your passion," arguing it implies a single, pre-determined passion that should be known by a certain age. He points out that many successful entrepreneurs at Alpine companies, were never able to "follow their passion" there. He finds that this advice is impractical and potentially harmful because:
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It assumes there is only one passion.
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It sets unrealistic expectations to have a lifelong passion defined early in life.
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Many people simply do not know what their passion is.
Following Energy: A More Practical Approach
Instead, Weaver suggests following what gives you energy. He notes that doing things he wasn't passionate about was draining and unsustainable. Focus on activities that invigorate and energize you. What you like may change as you grow, but most people can identify what they do not like, and this is a good starting point.
Action and Output: Testing Your Interests
To discover what truly resonates, try to produce something, and it's crucial to create tangible output based on your interests to assess their viability. Test those things out. Do not just be interested in something, but make something that will help others solve their problems. Consider how you feel when creating that output, and if you enjoy the process. This also tests whether your passion can be transformed into a skill.
Find Your "Factory Settings"
Everyone has their factory settings, or original self. Those settings are:
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Original output method
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Original thinking and receiving method
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Original way of interacting with others
Following factory settings will result in higher results, and will lead to greater happiness.
Overcoming Fear and Procrastination
The Danger of "Not Now"
Weaver highlights the danger of procrastination, often masked as waiting for the "right time." He shares an anecdote about a student, Sarah, who admired his career but feared failure.
Externalizing Fears
Weaver suggests writing down all fears to bring them to the surface and diminish their power. Once externalized, these fears can be examined objectively, which enables them to be effectively managed.
Practical Methods to Take Action
- Consider how to game plan to overcome those fears.
- Remind yourself that, more than likely, ten years from now, no one will care.
- Remember, "Failure doesn't matter, success does."
Combating Procrastination
Those who achieve high levels of success tend to over-plan, and over-think, making it hard to take action. The world changes so quickly that planning too far ahead has little practical value.
To overcome procrastination: 1. Do not plan too far ahead, take it step by step. 2. Give yourself a deadline, and move on to the next action.